You’ve been on my mind
I grow fonder every day,
Lose myself in time
Just thinking of your face
God only knows
Why it’s taken me so long
To let my doubts go

You’re the only one that I want
I don’t know why I’m scared, I’ve been here before
Every feeling, every word, I’ve imagined it all,
You’ll never know if you never try
To forgive your past and simply be mine

I dare you to let me be your, your one and only
Promise I’m worthy to hold in your arms
So come on and give me the chance
To prove I am the one who can
Walk that mile until the end starts

I’ve been on your mind?
You hang on every word I say
Lose yourself in time at the mention of my name
Will I ever know how it feels to hold you close?
And have you tell me whichever road I choose you’ll go

I don’t know why I’m scared ’cause I’ve been here before
Every feeling, every word, I’ve imagined it all,
You’ll never know if you never try
To forgive your past and simply be mine

I dare you to let me be your, your one and only
I promise I’m worthy to hold in your arms
So come on and give me the chance
To prove I am the one who can
Walk that mile until the end starts

I know it ain’t easy
Giving up your heart
I know it ain’t easy
Giving up your heart
(Nobody’s perfect, trust me I’ve learned it)
I know it ain’t easy, giving up your heart
(Nobody’s perfect, trust me I’ve learned it)
I know it ain’t easy, giving up your heart

So I dare you to let me be your, your one and only
I promise I’m worthy to hold in your arms
So come on and give me the chance
To prove I am the one who can
Walk that mile until the end starts

I want you to know
one thing.
You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.
Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.
If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.
If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.
But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.

QUIERO que sepas
una cosa.

Tú sabes cómo es esto:
si miro
la luna de cristal, la rama roja
del lento otoño en mi ventana,
si toco
junto al fuego
la impalpable ceniza
o el arrugado cuerpo de la leña,
todo me lleva a ti,
como si todo lo que existe,
aromas, luz, metales,
fueran pequeños barcos que navegan
hacia las islas tuyas que me aguardan.

Ahora bien,
si poco a poco dejas de quererme
dejaré de quererte poco a poco.

Si de pronto
me olvidas
no me busques,
que ya te habré olvidado.

Si consideras largo y loco
el viento de banderas
que pasa por mi vida
y te decides
a dejarme a la orilla
del corazón en que tengo raíces,
piensa
que en ese día,
a esa hora
levantaré los brazos
y saldrán mis raíces
a buscar otra tierra.

Pero
si cada día,
cada hora
sientes que a mí estás destinada
con dulzura implacable.
Si cada día sube
una flor a tus labios a buscarme,
ay amor mío, ay mía…

en mí todo ese fuego se repite,
en mí nada se apaga ni se olvida,
mi amor se nutre de tu amor, amada,
y mientras vivas estará en tus brazos
sin salir de los míos. 

photos by me, word by Pablo Neruda

I’ve been looking so long at these pictures of you
That I almost believe that they’re real
I’ve been living so long with my pictures of you
That I almost believe that the pictures are
All I can feel 

(from the Cure Trilogy)

Remembering
You standing quiet in the rain
As I ran to your heart to be near
And we kissed as the sky fell in
Holding you close
How I always held close in your fear
Remembering
You running soft through the night
You were bigger and brighter and whiter than snow
And screamed at the make-believe
Screamed at the sky
And you finally found all your courage
To let it all go
Remembering
You fallen into my arms
Crying for the death of your heart
You were stone white
So delicate
Lost in the cold
You were always so lost in the dark
Remembering
You how you used to be
Slow drowned
You were angels
So much more than everything
Hold for the last time then slip away quietly
Open my eyes
But I never see anything
If only I’d thought of the right words
I could have held on to your heart
If only I’d thought of the right words
I wouldn’t be breaking apart
All my pictures of you
Looking so long at these pictures of you
But I never hold on to your heart
Looking so long for the words to be true
But always just breaking apart
My pictures of you
There was nothing in the world
That I ever wanted more
Than to feel you deep in my heart
There was nothing in the world
That I ever wanted more
Than to never feel the breaking apart
All my pictures of you

sitting in my room in the dark

this song takes me back….twenty years

where I was sitting in my room in the dark

listening to the same words being sung to me.

I am 18 years old, the tape deck playing…

something so special to take me back…

something old made new

words and music that still have a way of holding onto my heart

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas!!

Shot with my iPhone and shared on my instagram

incalculable

limitless

unbounded

patient
waiting

listening…

desolate

vacant

deflated…

breathless – arrested

Let it go…
take it
empty me
leave me

let me go

just had to sing it

“I’ll be sure to keep my distance”

today I danced in my sleep

sang in your sweet dark dreams

swam to your lips in my head

held your hand in the light of the blue oceans sun…

…and I’ll be there
with you
in each song
in each of the moments

in our distance…

my words will hold you

kisses will cover you
all over

yielding

caressing, tickling….protecting..

truth is….

forgetting the taste of your lips

fragrant, melting…

reaching,

falling from eyes

and it doesn’t matter so…

come back to bed 

and stay here with me in my dreams…

I’ll be there
with you
in each song
in each of the moments

in our distance…

“for how much longer can I howl into this wind”

(words and photos by me except quotations)

My heart is sad and lonely

For you, I sigh, for you, dear only
Why haven’t you seen it, I’m all for you

Body and soul

I spend my days in longing
Wondering why it’s me that you’re wronging
I tell ya, I mean it, I’m all for you

Body and soul

I can’t believe it, it’s hard to conceive it
That you’d turn away romance.

Are you pretending, it looks like the ending
Unless, I could have one more chance to prove it, dear

My life a wreck you’re making
You know, I’m yours for just the taking
I’d gladly surrender myself to you

Body and soul

My life a wreck, you’re making
You know I’m yours for just the very taking
I’d gladly surrender myself to you

Body and soul

miss you amy….

Days like this
I don’t know what
To do with myself
All day and all night
I wander the halls
Along the walls and
Under my breath
I say to myself
I need fuel
To take flight
And there’s too
Much going on
But it’s calm under
The waves
In the blue of my oblivion
Under the waves in
The blue of my oblivion

Is that why they call me
A sullen girl, sullen girl
They don’t know
I used to sail the
Deep and tranquil sea
Nut he washed me shore
And he took my pearl
And left an empty
Shell of me
And there’s too
Much going on
But it’s calm under the waves
In the blue of my oblivion
Under the waves
In the blue of my oblivion
Under the waves
In the blue of my oblivion
It’s calm under the waves
In the blue of my oblivion

lyrics: Fiona Apple

Pics: me

“Don’t you ever let a soul in the world tell you that you can’t be exactly who you are.”

Lady Gaga

Join my group on flickr. showcasing YOU..

click on the pics below to see other fabulous women in Me,Myself,I

My pictures are also added to BAM

Some things cant be explained, and certain feelings can’t be expressed.

They just really ARE bigger then us.

You can’t control them. The feelings simply exist.

None of us are in control of how everything turns out.

Or where people go or if they love us as we love them.

It is what it is and what will be will be.

You can be yourself because I will remain here regardless.

I can be myself because you aren’t going anywhere.

There is a comfort in that, knowing this as truth…

even when the person isn’t here all the time to pay close attention to every little detail …

the love is there, the feelings are there

they remain a constant.

It wouldn’t matter who you met today or yesterday or where you go in your life or who you share time with or where we may each live or even if we never speak as we would like to or get to hold hands and kiss…

we may be lonely and alone at times; reaching…

but love remains. feelings remain.

the experience exists on its own.

No one can take that away. No time or distance can

Some things happen and some people come into your life and they hold a place in you and stay with you.

No one or any thing can take that away.

Feelings can’t be replaced.

Love is not something you can control or replace.

People can’t be replaced.

things, people, places…All special in and of themselves.

Not everyone or everything is love or special but it’s all

as it should be.

Where you are right now is where you are meant to be…

Where you should be.

It’s not a mistake. Nothing you go through is a mistake.

To love is to be free and know that even years from now, the love remains.

Maybe I cant be with you, today or next week or even next year, because maybe it isn’t the right time…

maybe our time will never come… or maybe this is our time.

Something’s aren’t set up to work out the way we expect or ask for or even want.

They just are.

If I love you then it is forever. And It is free. And you are free..

*all pictures taken with my iPhone 4 and shared on instagram stream. words by me

Estoy enamorado
Simplemente
Te lo quiero confesar
Te lo queria decir
Totalmente ilusionado
Me la paso pensandote
Nunca voy a soltarte

*

I will always be by your side

I’m in love
simply
I’ll confess

I wanted to say
I keep thinking of you
I’ll never let you go

I captured Love here – seen on the THESE MOMENTS blog.

Out there

you’ll see it all.
The floating ends
will meet and mend,
and you will be yourself;
your fully-formed,
though always changing,
self of selves.
Every clumsy backward look
will pay for itself.
Every tear you’ve cried,
or wanted to cry,
will set your broken bones.
The rips in your heart
will no longer
need to be guarded
by steel girders,
banyan trees,
or even rice paper.
Not so much as a
dragonfly’s wing
will you need
to cover the bludgeoned place,
to protect the private you
you love so much
and hope to save intact
from what has seemed years
of relentless pummeling.

Go and live and love
in peace, my friend,
for surely there is love
to enfold you,
and life to be feasted upon:
your portion is boundless.
Love will be the more
you’ve wanted.
You will know it
when you see it.
You will love yourself
as no lover
has ever had the courage
to love;
and the warmth you’ve wanted
will line your pillowcases,
dance upon your windowsill,
and hide
at the ends of your socks
awaiting your toes.

-Deborah Mears

Flume ~ bon iver

I am my mother’s only one
It’s enough
I wear my garment so it shows
Now you know

Only love is all maroon
Gluey feathers on a flume
Sky is womb and she’s the moon

I am my mother on the wall
With us all
I move in water, shore to shore
Nothing’s more

Only love is all maroon
Lapping lakes like leery loons
Leaving rope burns, reddish ruse

Only love is all maroon
Gluey feathers on a flume
Sky is womb and she’s the moon

find me and my Instagram photos here.

Since I graduated, started a new job, and a new life on my own, I have been adjusting, reflecting, thinking…I haven’t been shooting as much as I would like to, however, I carry my phone with me everywhere and can’t help but shoot everything I see. You can find me on flikr and instagram all the time.

Graduating was a wonderful feeling. I know it was 20 years past when I felt I should have graduated, but it was an accomplishment I won’t ever forget. I was determined and focused and I enjoyed it. I used all the struggle and pain in my life to fuel my body and my brain to keep going, and it was something special, almost magical. Something just about me. Something that was mine and no one could take that away. I was in control of the outcome and I didn’t give up.

I learned more from that experience then from any in my life. I learned more about myself in this feat more than any in my life, and in this battle, I WON!

Lately, I just wanna be….

I don’t want to push myself, schedule myself, force myself to do anything or be anything. I just wanna be!  Just taking one small step at a time. Waking up without a plan, without thinking too far ahead, without feeling I missed out, or could haves, should haves.

Just to be.

I am merely just a shadow of what I used to be, and it hasn’t been a smooth ride on the rollercoaster of my crazy life. I find myself now… searching for that girl, that heart, the smile, all that was me. I need time. I want to give myself time, freedom and space. Quiet, solitude…for healing and reflection, for saying nothing. Just to be…

Like the flowers, like the trees,

the Sun, the rain…like they all do.

to shine in the light and be just like me.

I need time to just be…

Searching for a destiny that’s mine

there’s another place another time…
Touching many hearts along the way
hoping that I’ll never have to say

It’s just an illusion – illusion – illusion.

Follow your emotions anywhere
is it really magic in the air?
Never let your feelings get you down.

Open up your eyes and look around
It’s just an illusion – illusion – illusion.

Could it be that it’s just an illusion putting me back in all this confusion?
Could it be that it’s just an illusion now?
Could it be that it’s just an illusion putting me back in all this confusion?
Could it be that it’s just an illusion now?

Could it be a picture in my mind?

Never sure exactly what I’ll find.
Only in my dreams I turn you on.

Here for just a moment then you’re gone.
It’s just an illusion – illusion – illusion.

Could it be that it’s just an illusion putting me back in all this confusion?
Could it be that it’s just an illusion now?

Could it be that it’s just an illusion putting me back in all this confusion?
Could it be that it’s just an illusion now? . . .

pictures taken by me, lyrics by Imagination, Just an Illusion

and throw them in the ocean…

“Breathe (2 AM)”

just breathe…

words by Anna Nalick

I am happy
That I have you
Even though you´re not here now
I know somewhere
You are dreaming
Though it´s definitely not of me

It doesn’t matter

If this all shatters
Nothing lasts forever
But I´m praying
That we´re staying
Together

I am warmed
By your friendship
Even when you´re far away
And I´m happy
In the knowledge
We may never see the day

when I kiss you
And you kiss me
Don´t pretend you miss me
The worst kind
Of diseased mind
Is one filled with jealousy

If we should meet again
Don´t try to solve the puzzle
Just lay down next to me
And please don´t move a muscle

I will thank you
Most of all for
The respect you have for me
I´m embarrassed
It overwhelms me
Because I don´t deserve any

it doesn’t matter…

if this all shatters
Nothing lasts forever
But I´m praying
That we´re staying
Together

~depeche mode

Yes…I had a goal, a dream, followed it through and

DID IT!!!!!

The hardest but most rewarding two years of my life!

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the Pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeoning’s of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the Horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll.

I am the master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul.